


50 shades of douche

by acornsandarrows



Category: Homestuck
Genre: M/M, im trying something out ok, kind of a new style?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-02
Updated: 2014-06-02
Packaged: 2018-02-03 03:14:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1728968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/acornsandarrows/pseuds/acornsandarrows
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's John's first time catching a bus! In Texas! Amazing!</p>
            </blockquote>





	50 shades of douche

[15:05 Wednesday 3/4/20]

First time catching the bus in Texas!

Hm. Bus is not so different from our ones back home…

Warmer though!! I don’t have to wear seven sweater’s when walking around anymore

I think I’m the only person on this bus oh man

No no wait there’s a guy getting on

He has the biggest headphones I’ve ever seen in my life

Dang is he reading fifty shades of grey?    

Update: yes he is

[15:05 Thursday 4/4/20]

Here we are again

I brought a book this time, didn’t realise how long the trip was yesterday bluh

This job better be as good as it was on day one for the long run

I LOVE BIOLOGY!!

Oh good 50 shades of douche is back

He’s actually wearing shades too

I’ve been meaning to read this for ages! Let’s go game of thrones

[15:05 Friday 5/4/20]

I just figured out yesterday was 4/20

BLAZE IT

Look at me being down with the humour of today’s youths

The ancient 23 year old college student raises a tired rock on before retiring at 10:30 to watch Good Life and have some beans on toast

Who knew being on a bus for an hour every day would make you ramble?

Does anyone even know what Good Life is?

[15:05 Monday 2/5/20]

Oh man two espresso shots was not a good idea at two am this morning

Damn you GOT for being so addictive!!!!!

Yeah I’m a slow reader

Douche finished 50 shades of grey in like a week

I don’t think he’s started anything new

It’s weird we’ve been catching the same bus for almost a month now huh

Man I’m so starved

It’s either pizza or pizza for dinner tonight

Maybe I could steal some of Jade’s cash and get Chinese

I think she’d notice though! Sniff me out haha

Got the nose of a dog that one

She’s going to beat me up when I get to the lab I can tell

[15:35 Tuesday 3/5/20]

FUCK I MISSED THE BUS

I HAD TO WAIT HALF AN HOUR FUCK KARKATS GONNA KILL ME!!!!!!!!

This is what happens when you play video games without a timer!!

It’s a dangerous world out there kids

The bus is here thank god

  Oh man I’m so beat

I didn’t even bring a book I don’t have anything to do bluh

I can’t even spy on douche because I’m guessing he caught his bus

Maybe he’s a douche but he’s probably not dumb as well!

[15:05 Wednesday 4/5/20]

YAY I’M ALIVE :)

That was so traumatising bus I’m never going to leave you again

When I say leave I mean fall asleep and catch the later one

I missed you seats that smell of cola

Douche boy my old friend

Dang!!

He just nodded at me!!

I nodded back we have a real connection going rn

[15:05 Tuesday 10/5/20]

I still haven’t found anything good to read

Should probably start the next book in game of thrones huh

God

I know douche and I have this weird head nodding thing going on but does he have to listen to his music so loud?

I just signalled to him to turn it down

Wait

He’s standing up

I think he’s coming over here?

No dude!! I just wanted you to turn the music down!!! AARGH

[15:05 Wednesday 11/5/20]

So douche has a name and it’s Dave Strider

He thought I wanted to listen to music with him

‘Bit weird but hey, I do have superb fuckin taste I bet anyone would want an earful of these sweet tunes’

If nothing else Dave’s a Real Texan Dude

Is Texan a word?

We’re listening to ‘American Idiot’ right now

[15:05 Thursday 12/5/20]

I brought my ipod today!

We’re listening to my songs right now

Dave just asked if I have movie soundtracks on my ipod

I think he meant ironically

Haha

If only he knew

Abort acquaintance mission he doesn’t like Con Air abort abort

[15:05 Friday 13/5/20]

I downloaded the Con Air soundtrack onto my ipod

And the Bee Movie

I think that was an accident though

Bluh

The bus just passed Dave’s stop and he wasn’t there

Ah well

I have ‘How do I live without you’ and that’s all I need

And of course the Bee Movie

Again, I’m pretty sure that wasn’t on purpose?

[15:05 Wednesday 6/6/20]

Dave and I just finished watching the Bee Movie for the second time this week

I think I’m crying with laughter oh boy

This is the first time I’ve seen cool kid douche boy laugh!

Spoiler: he’s a nerd

He does the snorting thing and everything hehe

[15:05 Thursday 7/6/20]

It sure is brisk in Texas

Thank you for existing scarf!!

This fucking bus doesn’t have heating I’m demanding a refund on my body temperature

‘That doesn’t even make sense’ SHUT UP DAVE

Looking over people’s shoulders is so rude

Only really really dumb people do it this is a fact

[15:05 Friday 8/6/20]

I’m so ready for this week to be over bluh

My nose has been pressed right down on the grindstone!!

Strider and I are going to paint the town red

‘Don’t pee into the fucking wind you idiot’- Dave Strider 2k20

Of course I know that’s just a saying!! Of course I do haha

Completely unrelated topic once I was kicked out of a bar for bringing a jar of paint out of my bag, brandishing a paint brush and yelling ‘MAYBE I’M TOO TIRED TO PAINT THE TOWN RED BUT I SURE AS HELL CAN GIVE IT A SHOT’   

I was really drunk

Rose has the whole thing on her phone I had to pay her in two weeks worth of manual labour to stop her posting it online

It was pretty fun actually her idea of manual labour is making snow men with baby Roxy in the back yard

And she only actually made me come down like three times

[15:05 Monday 15/6/20]

I’m taking dumb butt Strider to see the lab today!!

Well I say lab but the majority of it’s a zoo for endangered species

But where I work is a lab

I’m surprising Dave with a behind the scenes tour of the enclosures!!

Hopefully he’ll get some good snaps of the animals for his portfolio

[15:05 Tuesday 16/6/20]

((Guess who got kissed in the giraffe enclosure))


End file.
